Psalm 6
While they were dating, they discussed how many children they wanted. She said, “At least four.”
He joked, “Well, no more than ten.”
She said, “I hope they have your red hair.”
He smiled wryly, “I hope they don’t have their mother’s sense of humor.”
They did everything right. They got married. They lived responsibly. They watched their diets and maintained their health. They fully enjoyed the benefits of being young newlyweds.
They waited.
They bought a house. Even in this economy, they found the perfect home for a family. They had four bedrooms to fill. They had a big backyard, ideal for little ones to burn off all their energy.
How long? How long until God’s blessing, “Be fruitful and multiply”, would be theirs? Was a little boy with his daddy’s shocking red hair or a little freckle-faced girl with her mommy’s smile too much to ask?
How long?
Her little sister called with good news. She forced herself to be happy.
Her mom dropped little hints. She held back the tears.
His brother had them over for Christmas. His tree was overflowing with presents. Their tree had just a few His home was so full of life. When they returned to their big house, it seemed so empty, so quiet. How long?
They had a good life, fulfilling careers, stability and comfort. They would have traded it all for some sleepless nights and stinky diapers. They were able to give to their community, but they struggled to feel fully a part of it. They had no little one to whom they could share it all.
They waited.
They saw some specialists, but they didn’t want to interfere with her hormones. She was healthy. People suggested IVF, but although many children have been given the precious gift of life in those labs, millions more have been created and then discarded and many are inhumanely stored on ice. They couldn’t support an industry that sells babies for profit.
They waited and they prayed. Tears flooded their bed. They ached for the joy that never came.
They researched adoption, but besides the waiting and the expense, they found their hearts weren’t in it. Adoption is wonderful, but it wasn’t for them, at least not now. They saw the foster system, even volunteered, but somehow, and how they tried to fight this feeling, somehow seeing those children only filled them with more bitterness. She found it difficult to be compassionate to those families. How could God give children to those who could do this, while their arms were empty?
They waited. They prayed. How long?
For what have you been waiting? Our hearts know that ache. For healing. For security. For safety. For a godly spouse. For a better world. For that happy life. For freedom from that temptation. For a better relationship. For the end of this journey to join your loved ones in the glory to come. How long? Lord, why do I have to wait? What did I do wrong? How long?
Psalm 6 gives you permission to feel this way. David teaches us to ask “How long?” in faith.
Sin has fully corrupted this world. Sin has fully corrupted our hearts. Sin has fully corrupted our lives. We feel this. We see it around us as all creation groans (Romans 8:22). Our hearts experience it. We feel what sin has done; we feel it down to our bones. How long? This is a good prayer. Even the saints under the altar cry, How long? (Revelation 6:10) When we see sorrow in this world, when we long for better, it is good to pray to God, even to ask, “How long?”
God hears you. God knows your sorrow and pain. He himself has endured that longing. He has set the day for your relief. But God is not like Amazon. You can’t select the life you want, the thing that you think you need and have it delivered the next day. God has his own timing. God has his own purposes. God makes his how plans. Your wait will never change his love. You may see that day of relief in this life. You will be able to testify to all the goodness of God. That day may come in the life to come, when God himself will wipe every tear from your eyes, and you will join the family of believers in the joys that will never end. You will see God’s glory. You will know God’s love. You will never need to cry “how long” again.
When your heart cries, “how long”, cry in faith. The same Lord who kept his word to redeem you, who loves you, He hears you. He will answer. He will remove your shame forever.